black despondency;

We chose this ourselves

2009-11-25T18:58:13Z

All those talk about destiny, fate, natural forces of the earth and what not, are the words of cowards. Cowards, who do not have the guts to take control of their lives or to take responsibilities for their mistakes and misjudgments. Cowards, who do not have any semblance of balls to admit what they really want. Destiny my fuck.

We chose it, even if we don't know how, why or when. Call me a skeptic, cynic, whatever. I so DO NOT believe in abstract things like destiny or fate.

But for the record, you ARE an Idiot.

For the last 40 hours or so, I have watched a gazzilion movies thanks to hanschungiechung and also spent more than I have ever spent during the exam period!!!! PLEASE watch district9. Hans cried watching it, can you believe it? Hans that dodo actually cried!! and 2012, when death hits you in the face, nothing else matter as much as the people whom you love. You think yuri was destined to die? If he didn gey kiang and go climb down the ladder, he wouldn have! See its a choice thing! & that russian pilot was so damn hot!! and sacrificial too! I wish I could turn things around, but I can't because we're no longer on the same cliff you see.

Because of US, they can no longer hang out as a group, or share common areas, or go on group dates. It's like the most selfish thing that I've ever done, all because of my pride or whatever uglier thing. It used to bother me because we were so close, and then it saddens me because you like to act all high-nosed and nonchalant and uppity when I know you are not. (or maybe i never knew you =/ ) Then it frustrates me because this stupid I-dont-know-what-to-call-it has affected others. Does it not bother you? Maybe you havent noticed, but it doesn't change the fact that it has. Just because we both pretend that nothing has happened and block each other out like we're firewalls doesn't mean nothing has ever happen. Its so lame.

But you know what? We;re all saved by the bell. The end of A's is the bell. Congratulations! This calls for a celebration! ooh that;s my favourite phrase recently.

AND I obviously know that my tagboard is not there because I removed it! Duh.

Happy 18th birthday gossip clubber!!!!

The reason why this year was great because I got to know you better and found that you're a really awesome guy, albeit sisssssy at times. I really admire you for your.. you know, undying spirit! You're honestly one of the most sincere persons Ive met in VJ and I count myself lucky for that =D Even though most of the times when you text me, its either to answer physics or math questions, Im perfectly fine with you exploiting my awesome brains hahaha. You do not know it, but Ive also learnt some stuff from you here and there. So, anyway, good luck for whatever you're working hard for!!! I'll always be a phonecall away!

I know you'll be reading this you stalker! HAPPY 18th! =D

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I say... we stick with fourty.

2009-11-19T18:16:56Z

Who was it that lead you on
that made you want to hurt me so
Who are you out to forget
who's forgot you long ago

Shit that. I miss anberlin, wished they could come again! Sometimes I wished I stayed in the states, so I could travel a few hours to watch them acoustic set. Stuck in this shithole little red dot, waiting for bands to come is like waiting for my boobs to grow bigger. Near impossible. & why is ticketing so exorbitant when the primary purpose of music like that is to share the love, share the passion. I'm sure they need us to pay like over a hundred dollars to let them mainstream popular bands earn a fat paycheck. Thank god A isnt so mainstreamed, yet. Plus we don't have income and most of us do not have loaded parents to live off. [ I hate it when people flaunt their wealth when it wasnt even earned by them. ya la ya la im a sour grape, cannot eat the grape say the grape sour hahaha ]

Acoustic music sends me straight to heaven. Lady gaga is amazing. Her music is addictive, her videos out-of-this-world, and her acoustic sets and vocals, its on a whole 'nother level altogether! wow.

:D I really like the monsoon season. Yesterday as I was walking home, I saw two girls, one a little older than I am, and the other a little younger than I am. The younger one was running around in the rain, barefooted, laughing and smiling while the older one was just... standing under her umbrella.

Its nice to embrace the rain ^^ & then feel super cold and shivery after and then take a warm bath and then hide under the covers!

I like vox because it makes me feel a little more unique. It doesnt have much functions or designs and isnt even 24/7 workable. People cant even make comments without signing up. That's ridiculous! But I like it. There're just somethings that you like, even though its nothing special, or whatever. You just like it.

Econs P1! Scaryscaryscary.

Now I know what it feels like to be so one-sided. O well.

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You made it possible

2009-11-19T14:08:31Z

Ragen says:

HAHAH YES

IM 91.3 now

hahahaha

TIME FOR MIRACLES RIGHT

GOT

LADY JAR JAR

BAD ROMANCE

ALSO GOT

J/ says:

YA hahha omg 91.3!!

Ragen says:

SIMILANJIAO

ALSO GOT

J/ says:

YA!

now i listen to 91.3 when im studying instead hahahaha

Ragen says:

i am 91.3

hahaha

J/ says:

hahhaa u seem so high suddenly, talking about 91.3

Ragen says:

ra ra ra ma ma

hahaha

u know wad

i got 2 cans of naughty g now

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

J/ says:

HAHA siao

Ragen says:

MY FREN BOUGHT FOR ME

SHE SAY SHE HEARD ITS GOOD FOR LATE NIGHT STUDYING

hahahahahaha

J/ says:

So does it work?

Ragen says:

i dun dare to try

later i go crazy

hahahah

91.3 is the new shit. & naughty G?! only people like jasonteyshouhengandtracy would try that!

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Through dark there is light

2009-11-18T14:29:30Z

I cannot believe that SOL + Oil prices + GBL + MF due to Market P came out! Lucky me to spot the topics! But too bad the questions were not the usual kind and on top of that, A's are so unpredictable!! If what I thought I wrote was correct but in reality wrong, I'll be =/

Life is funny. One moment you are at loggerheads with this person, but when a common enemy appears, you become the best of friends. Don't really understand the things that people are doing. Really--don't--under---stand. *raises left eyebrow

Big boobs

I'll bet it feels good to have more developed tities to fill up your clothes. I don't mean saggy big, I mean a little bigger than small kind of big haha. Let's face it, we all want them bigger. Well, at least most of us do! Unless you have an identity crisis or have an abnormally huge amount of testosterones or perhaps you just like it flat.

4 more papers to dooooomsday omgah.

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Je sais, je t'ai éloigné

2009-11-16T02:14:23Z

Hi there, Im here to blog about my immensely weird dream last night.

First off, it involved lydia, pei, some tall skanky girl, two buff guys and me. We were at the beach & all of a sudden they decided to play the oujia board or whatever. So we were in a circle, one buff guy on my left and lydia on my right. then we held hands, and I felt a REALLY strong grip on both of my hands!! Ok haha then we started asking lame questions and then when I finally asked THE question. " Is he...... or is he.....?" Then the oujia person/ghost, answered "yes". Before I could further ask yes to what, an irritatingly loud and eerie music woke me up. FUCK! I woke up, looked around, and realised that it was just me who kicked my sister's electronic lantern.

And my questions went unanswered, again.

Shit im late for breakfast with feifei fitfit and peipei!

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This achin heart aint broken yet

2009-11-14T17:05:21Z

It's another one of those perfect nights for snuggling up with a book or a good movie together with a pal! Would've been a waste to let the amazing weather slip away, so I walked around the estate for awhile before heading home. Guess what I found? A gathering sort of corner where a bunch of juvenile-potential-delinquents were watching TV with a bunch of grannie granpas. Warm. But of course I hid my curiosity and pretended that I was just walking past la.

I think I can imitate the southern accent pretty well haha! Stephan's true accent is really the-bomb. I think I'm addicted to true blood. And no, its not what you're thinking! I don't think I'm addicted because of the sexual tension, steamy sex scenes and violence. I think! Hah, Ok not like anybody else watches it.. I haven;t watched/read twilight because its so... PU PIAN, for lack of a better word haha! But I'm still sure that TB is better! Ok fine I'm just biased. ( I need to get the whole series of books!! )

Adam Lambert's song for 2012, Time for Miracles, makes me...sad.

H doesnt have any double papers except for GP and he ends next week!!! No fair! To think I thought PCME was the best combi for not having double papers. neyh.... I'm so stoked that Econs' in like 4 days! (;

Do you think I'm special?
Do you think I'm nice?
Am I bright enough to shine in your spaces?
Between the noise you hear
And the sound you like
Are we just sinking in an ocean of faces?

When did you become so disgusting?

Shit, Grace and I are starting another one of those, "Check this youtube vid out!" or "Search this on youtube" cycle. Again!

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Why did you stop?

2009-11-13T12:01:16Z

"I don't wanna be friends, you fool!" screamed her.

Hate it when people you don't really fancy like the same thing as you do. Get what I mean?

P&I got the interview (: yippiedidoo!

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Bill!

2009-11-10T11:59:22Z

True Blood

It's definitely better than twilight.

With the new "vampire craze" Trammell has been asked on several interviews if he has seen that other vampire craze,Twilight
I haven't seen it, The sense I get is Twilight is PG and ours is bordering on NC-17

Whooo hooo! Today was first paper. A's are gonna be over before ye know it! =D

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Oh my god, look at the kind of person that you were!

2009-11-07T16:49:28Z

So I was over at Lydia's the other day and she showed me all her old notebooks and our old secret book that we used to share with bel & hs. O-M-G, i tell you, it was insanely hilarious. We are wayyyyy too childish back then. Back in those days, we played ball everyday and 260 was our favourite hang out. & we loved captain's cook HAHA! That was also the place where A&I first held hands. hahah wtf right.

So I dug up my secondary one blog today. O-M-G i tell you...... I TyPedd Likke tt Worzxz.

No kidding.

And every post was about basketball, training and more basketball. & I used to actually run pretty fast! Ok but PY's faster, her leg muscle used to beat the whole team hands down. One time I ran 1st tgt with Shermin for one of our "running tests" and i was darn happy hahahhaa. Check out my passion yo.

& ALSO, I had a post about me being censured by hairy toh for using friendster, god how long ago was that, when i was failing math. Yes I used to like fail math all the time. I remember I was like last 2nd in class. & anyway, so that triggered me to go for math tuition at mavis, and that's how I found Mr Ng and then I was like UNSTOPPABLE. hahaha ok right. I would marry K Ng. *swooons*

Also, I talked about some people in my old blog, that i have NO recollection of now or whatsoever. I'm so afraid that the people that I talk about in this blog will also be long gone from my life 5 years down the road. Now, that's scary.

A levels are in 2 days!!! Right, as if you don't already know. GOOD LUCK to ya'll!

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I wished money would appear magically.

2009-11-06T16:37:39Z

Don't give up till you aint got nothing left.

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